15 August 2007

stupid

Apparently, I like being stressed and anxious. Love it, in fact. Because if I didn't then I wouldn't insist on getting myself all emotionally worked up when my brain is thinking logically and telling me to calm down and reminding me that other times when I have felt this exact same way, things have always turned out fine and to put more faith in God and stop trying to make my own plans only to end up upset when they don't work out the way that I had planned, but end up working out perfectly according to God's plan. And everytime, every single time, every single fucking time, I look back and I laugh at myself for being so foolish. Yet, I continue to do it again and again. WHY?!?! That's the part I can't get. So the answer must be that I enjoy it.

4 comments:

dreamyj said...

yea girl, you do...

Jameil said...

or maybe you're just human. don't beat yourself up. learn from it and move on.

Ray said...

Seriously, I mean it is like you dont enjoy it but it is a comfort zone thing. I mean have fun, and live it up to the fullest...

Leela said...

i'm working on it jade! i swear!

thanks jameil and ray. i need to look at things from a different perspective at times.